Thursday, October 22, 2009
Mannerisms
Two brothers, one 4 and one nearly 2 with two completely different personalities, in fact they look completely different as well. Our eldest is the gentlest soul, he does not fight, is sensitive and loves to understand what makes the world tick, how things work, a thinker. Our youngest is fearless and not concerned with consequences, a doer. He bounces out of bed in the morning, usually the first one up. He has an immense amount of energy. He has a permanent smile on his face and will probably grow up to be one of those people who jumps the queue and gets away with it, way too much charm. Both of them are unique combinations of our traits, fascinating. They are truly little people, mini-me's with so much to discover, the whole is still a mystery to them (it's still to me).My opinion? We carry the best and the worst of both our parents (or who ever our primary caregivers were). It's up to us when we grow up one day to choose what we keep and what we discard when it comes to our introjected values and habits. I was privileged to be coached over a two year period and later completed a coaching certification as part of my life quest. This has helped me to become much more aware of my own feelings and my impact on those around me. I intend to pass these super essential life skills (not yet taught at our local schools) on to our boys so that they have the best possible start to life.
To the parents, what has your experience been like with your children ito helping them to develop the much needed soft skills required to cope with the emotional-stuff that life throws at us?
Saturday, October 17, 2009
Joy is...
watching cartoons with my boywith him explaining in detail
who the baddies are,
what their super powers are and
what the names of the various characters are :D
His favourite at the moment is Ben 10 Alien Force. Great for dads and boys alike. I give it an 8/10 for its great story line and subtle infusion of adult humour.
Joy is...
reading a story to
my nearly 4 year old boy
and, at its end, him asking:
"Read it again pleeeaase daddy?"
Dodging a Nr 2 Nappy Change :D
What follows is my account of one of those unspoken (and probably unwritten) experiences that parents of babies have when it comes to changing nr 2 nappies, enjoy the comedy.We've somehow managed to potty-train our eldest boy a little while ago. Our youngest is still using nappies (about 20mths at the time of writing) which means that we probably have another year of nappy changing to go. Both my wife and I are quick to change a nr 1 nappy, no wet wipes required. However, a nr 2 is where the fun and games begin. The list of excuses we've both used are endless when it comes to NOT wanting to change a number 2. From having a headache, to a backpain, to claims of nausea, to running out of the room before the other is aware of the impending change.
We had a nr 2 experience last night. So, there we were watching TV together as a family when I became aware of a nr 2 odour in our midst. Within 2 minutes the odour had invaded the entire room. So, I asked the question which led both of us to instinctively haul excuses at each other as mentioned above. At some point I ran out of our bedroom and locked the door from the outside. My wife, suffocating, ran through the other door into the bathroom, leaving our youngest boy in the nr 2 cloud. About 15 seconds later I caved, and fetched our boy to take him to the changing station. The nr 2 changing process was regularly interrupted by sprints out of the room to take a few deep breaths and then back again into the war zone. I can't imagine changing someone elses child, with my boys I do it out of love for them and for no other reason.
Needless to say we found ourselves in a catch 22, i.e. either we opened the bedroom window and then introduce a mosquito problem or we could leave the window closed and deal with the odour in another way. We eventually lit an incense stick and within 5 minutes we were watching TV again :D
Monday, October 12, 2009
Picking up Stompies
We had two friends (a couple, let's call them Neo and Trinity) over the weekend for a mince curry over the fire. The curry tasted superb and no, I was not the cook. I made the fire (imagine me beating my fists against my chest and screaming out like Tarzan). Our friends brought along 2 of their 5 God children. The kids had tons of fun, from playing on the jungle gym, racing their bikes around the house, watching cartoons, playing with a variety of toys, playing in the sand pit and they even attempted to set up and play (unsuccessful though) the Nintendo Wii all by themselves. At some point in their visit, Neo mentioned to me that the older kids (ours and theirs) were attempting to play the Wii game all by themselves. He also pointed out that they were unsuccessful. I was busy pushing our youngest on the swing (a different left-field story on its own) at the time. BTW: My eldest plays both Mario Kart as well as Sim Racing quite well. I, however, usually start the console and ensure that the remotes are working before play time comences. On scale of 1 to 10 where 1 is really bad and 10 is excellent, I score Mario Kart an 8/10 and Sim Racing a 5/10.It never occurred to me to help the older children set up the game so that they could play. I only realized this earlier this evening, 2 days later. At the time, I remembered my eldest son saying that the game remotes were not working and that the batteries were probably flat. I'm not sure what triggered me to recall this specific experience of their visit. I was filled with a ton of guilt when the realization hit me, i.e. I wasn't paying attention when my boy needed my help. This may be something small to you and me as adults but to my son it was a disappointment probably followed by a little embarrasment (I know him like this, an introvert who has to muster up the courage to join a group of children who are strangers to him, i.e. he takes a little while longer to warm up to new people (big and small). While I may not be in position to protect him from every disappointment/injury in life I usually and instinctively protect him when I happen to be PRESENT.
Two take aways:
1. It's 'usually' never to late to apologise. It was, however, a little challenging to find the vocabulary to adequately explain why I was apologizing to him, a 3.5 year old boy.
2. Also, no need to overcompensate with sweets and toys, a mistake is just that, a mistake. The bribery thing can do a nasty thing to a child's habits later in life so use this card sparingly.
Thursday, October 8, 2009
Short-term Twitter functionality horizon, possibilities
The CEO of Twitter recently disclosed some exciting new features on the Twitter functionality horizon (CBS News article). This includes plans for an embedded reputation management system, LBT (Location-based tweeting/tweets) and the introduction of user groups aimed at improving follower/followee management. He also said that they (as in Twitter) understand that things don't always unfold as you think they will on the Web. The message? They are not trying to be too clever about what Twitter should be. A related message was echoed by a Cloud Computing speaker at a recent Gartner IT symposium I attended in Cape Town in August 2009. The speaker said that in the Cloud Computing space application developers will not always know how application consumers will use their applications. This could be viewed as an invitation to us to actively experiment with the technology to see what we can co-create. You and me, the community. It's truly exciting times we live in!So what could LBT bring to our Twitter experience? Consider the following as one possible scenario. The idea: location-based real-time customer experience management. Imagine a big retail chain that monitors Twitter for LBT about its brand (could be made visible via a dashboard in the retailer's call centre). Imagine a customer service representative solving a client's problem before the client leaves the store out of frustration without making a purchase? Remember, it's easier to keep an existing client happy through great customer service than to find new clients to replace that ones you've lost. Think about the business opportunities that this could spawn?
And what additional value will an embedded self-organizing reputation/credibility management system add to our Twitter experience? One possibility is that it could help me to build a cleaner and thus healthier Twitter community, one that automatically weeds out the spammers. The principle is that I may know a twitter subscriber in person in the offline world. I then rate this person on Twitter based on my personal relationship with them. When this person chooses (for what ever reason) to follow you on Twitter you can immediately get a sense of that person's reputation as a direct result of me having previously rated the person (as well as others ratings of the same person) concerned.
Offcourse their could be many other benefits. Your thoughts?
Thanks to @ronjsauer who brought the original CBS News article to my attention.
Tuesday, October 6, 2009
Extracting real business value from Twitter
Twitter is a global database of near-realtime 'life experience' data (sales pitches included, spam as well). Companies have been quick at finding innovative ways of extracting real business value from the ever growing Twitter database which is reported to have more than 50 million active users (data contributors in one way or another). @brandmonday is a great example of such an initiative on Twitter by @capetown, a social media consumer activism project in South Africa. Check out their website: www.capetown.peeps.co.za. The IDEA? Take two hashtags (#brandplus, #brandminus), include the company name being rated on customer service and provide concise real-time client experience feedback wherever you go via your mobile phone. The whole message in less than 140 characters means becoming creative and cleverer with the feedback. Imagine the possibilities for how this data could be mined? Example, @brandmonday could engage with the companies that have been rated via their realtime rating service to help them better manage their brand reputation online and offline, i.e. to assist them with achieving and maintaining the status of a #brandplus company. The addition of geotagging technology such as flickr could create a location-based realtime global dashboard of customer service (pictures and text). Just imagine.
Monday, October 5, 2009
Being a dad, what it feels like ...
I am the proud parent of two young boys, one nearly 2 and the other nearly 4 years old. They have a brought kind of joy to my life that is beyond words. When I'm away from them I miss them all the time, not now and then, all THE time. To those of you who do not have any children, consider the following analogy to get a better sense of just how profound this experience is for me: Imagine life without the air that we breathe. I know, it sounds crazy and it's almost impossible to imagine such a thing, right? The idea of losing either of my boys is infinitely more inconceivable than the idea of no air. Just the thought stream generated from the previous sentence makes it difficult to breathe right now. Chances are that if you are fellow parent then you could be feeling the pang as well.On a MUCH lighter note, my boys are mommy's boys. I am at a loss for words when it comes to attempting to describe the intense emotion associated with the rejection I experience as a result of the intense loyalty our boys feel to their mother, the centre of their universe, I just don't compete in this arena. I know, its not a competition. That's not the point. My wife experienced a 5 minute dose of this rejection with our youngest son about a month ago. She has no idea what it feels like to live with this rejection every day.You see, I know what it's like to be a mommy's boy, after all, I'm a mommy's boy and, for most of my life, my father was the villain, the obstacle, the one who hurt my mom's feelings. Karmah is truly a beach and I say this with a smirk on my face.
Your thoughts?
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Ghosts from Girlfriends Past
Just watched Ghosts From Girlfriends Past on DVD on my PS3. The movies stars Michael Douglas, Matthew McConaughey and Jennifer Garner, all superb actors in their own right. Even though the movie was predictable (happily ever after stuff) it still scores a solid 8/10 for its excellent humor and good as well as deep acting. Not for the younger viewers though, way too much tits, ass and cuddling for my 4 year old son, way too much explaining :-)My two take-aways as follows:
- Loving another means making yourself vulnerable. Remember those wise words ... "It's better to have loved and lost than not to have loved at all."
- Karmah is a B*I*T*C*H so be careful whose heart(s) you mess with. The table does turn and each dog gets its day.
Get Rich Quick Scheme = Low Self Esteem = Desperation
There are many people who are actively promoting get rich quick schemes via the likes of Twitter and Facebook . They all give the reader the impression that it's a sure win, that with very little effort you will be making millions within a few weeks to a year. The thing about a recession is that its populace are usually experiencing despair of one form or another, i.e. they are easy targets for get rich quick schemers/scammers. You know who you are. In short, they make up most of the spam on the Internet. If you're into get rich quick schemes then do us all a favour and STOP!The high prevalance of SPAM and, in particular, the high prevalance of get rich quick "opportunities" begs the following question: What makes someone promote such a scheme? What brings a person to this place of wanting to feed off others? Of selling empty promises? Of insulting the rest of us? So much so that spam has spawned a massive anti-spam industry.
The answer? DESPARATION, in my opinion. And Ethics is one of the first things to go when it comes to desparate people. Now is the time for putting our shoulders to the wheel, a time for reflection and reinvention, a time for contribution, NOT a time for conning your fellow human being.
Is there an alternative to all of this? Something more ethical and more sustainable? Is it really possible to make a legitimate income working fulltime via the Internet? Many will tell you YES! but have they really made the money they claim to have made? Ask yourself this ... If I legitametly made bucket loads of money on auto-pilot and I've consequently reached a place of financial freedom then WHY would I charge you $97 for my secret? WHY?
Your thoughts?
Saturday, October 3, 2009
7 EffectiveTwitter Practices
1. Growing your follower-base If you'd like to grow your follower base in an organic fashion then it may be useful to ask yourself the following questions: Who is my target market? What kind of keywords will find them? What could they be interested in? For example, my blog's about my experience as a dad. I target dads'. Some dads enjoy cars, gadgets and various other hobbies. So I conduct twitter searches for people who use these keywords. Then I also look at who they follow. Get it? I've also had limited success with www.tweepsearch.com. There are many other effective tools available, e.g. www.twello.com.
2. Quality over quantity
If you're selling something (tangible or intangible) then every twitter follower is a potential client. Every person on Twitter is also a potential supplier. So don't rush building your follower-base. Be quick about it but don't rush. It's going to take effort to build an appropriate follower-base. So, when someone follows you then have a squiz at their Twitter page and website/blog. I know, you don't have the time. Bottom line, if you're serious about this then make the time.
3. Who you follow
There are many people who'll tell you to follow everybody who follow's you. Don't be pressured into following every person that follows you. Check out your new follower's tweets and, if you have the time, their website/blog. If you find their tweets offensive or not to your liking for any other reason then you can choose whether or not to follow from this point. At least you did the research and are making an informed decision. Guard against projecting an air of arrogance about you, e.g. you have 20,000 followers but you only follow 23 people. What could this be saying about you to potential followers? Remember, the power of Twitter comes from your community, i.e. it's not just a soap box.
4. Tweet Nature
To me, Twitter's not about above-the-line advertising. Some do, however, use it this way. Instead, it's about your followers getting to know the person behind the product. So tweet about the interesting things that happen in your life. Share. This is about you joining the rest of us as an additional self-organizing (think tagging) "memory cell" coming online. Share your unique perspective of the world, each of us have one. Wouldn't it be amazing if we lived in a world where we share the best of ourselves with each other most of the time. Just imagine the innovation that could come of it?
5. Tweet Attitude
Twitter is a great platform to develop your wit (and sense of humor). Wit is what will get your followers to visit your blog/website. This is about using a bit of humor, keeping it light and being inspirational. Remember, you can only trick a follower once.
6. Your (lack of) Writing Experience
Twitter is not about having to complete a writing course before you can get started. Start today, start with sharing articles you regard as being useful. This is about you expressing yourself in your own unique way, one step at a time. This is what makes the web so exciting, i.e. it's diversity. You don't have to get it right first time, just get going. The rest will naturally follow.
7. Keeping yourself out of the mud
Let your spouse/partner know what you up to. 3-4 hours can easliy pass you by when tinkering on Twitter. It may help if you put a limit to your daily twitter activity. If you figure it out then PLEASE let me know!
Your thoughts?
Friday, October 2, 2009
Finding Your Blogging Spark
There are many philosophies on blogging. There are also many excuses to procrastinate, to not start. Get going, don't procrastinate, you don't need to get it right first time around. Remember, to err is human, it's our way of learning. Someone once said ... "we all want the nice life, the nice car, the perfect family, the holiday home, the great job, real friends, etc. If you REALLY want it, then ACT. Do one thing different each day."
Within a blogging context this means blogging about anything that you find interesting, WHAT EVER it may be. Just start. I've found that the more I blog the easier it becomes for me to express the wisdom I gain from my daily life experience.
Your thoughts on what inspire's you to blog?
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Twitter's Promise, the opportunity within the opportunity
The late 90's ushered in the dawn of the public Internet as we know it today. Back then, at least 14 years ago now, almost all information was free, from games, to music, to movies, to research, to porn and the list goes on. Soon people began to ask, "how do I make money from this thing called the Internet?" and the rest is history.I recently attended a Gartner conference where one of the speakers made (what I thought) quite a controversial statement, i.e. with Cloud Computing the application developers (e.g. Twitter) will not always foresee how application consumers (you and me) will use their applications. Take Twitter, for example, it orginally started out with people tweeting about their every movement. Soon people began to ask and are still asking, "how do I make money from this thing called Twitter?" Now Twitter is being used for above and below the line advertising and the owners of Twitter are seriously considering the advertisement route (like Facebook) now that they have more than 50 million active users, a captive audience, a distribution channel.
Twitter is more than that, i.e. it's also about the person/company behind the product. It's about sharing your passion with the rest of us, that thing that makes you unique, almost like a constantly evolving self-organizing (tagging) memory (think "IP") cell in the greater organism we call the Internet. Its about freely giving away your IP, just like in the good old days of the Internet, pirated or not. This can be a difficult thing to comprehend, i.e. giving away your IP. Back then, when I was an IT consultant, I was told by a very successful colleague of mine that his secret was that he focused on working himself out of a job. This created new opportunities for him all the time. Strange, I know. Twitter, Facebook, Flickr and others are providing us with a global platform for personal and collective reinvention.
Twitter's value emanates from the community, the collective, through conversation, but this community is MUCH bigger, it's global. This means that ground-zero information travels in seconds around the world. This is why the big "tradional" news companies are jumping on the social media band wagon, i.e. this is where they get their first hints of a breaking story, the latest news, on the ground, raw and real. Whether it be political views, weather news, real-estate expert opinion, what's happening on the ground in Sumatra, China, Samoa, USA, North Korea, India, SaaS expert opinion, sports results, etc. This is also why the "traditional" celebrity TV presenters such as Oprah, Ellen Degeneres and Martha Stewart use Twitter. They are using us for INSPIRATION. One of them recently asked their followers the following question: "If you were interviewing Serena Williams, what would you want to know about her?" Get it? We are all doing it to each other. We are all muses. Ask yourself this, "given the global doldrums that we find ourselves in, what is the price of INSPIRATION?" Can you put a price to it? This is Twitter's evolved promise, it's bigger than money.
Not sure about you, but since joining Twitter, I've very quickly become well-versed in a few fields such as SaaS, Cloud Computing and Social Media. What kind of conversations have you been following? have you been engaged in on Twitter? Is it possible that your area of focus on Twitter is making you part of a certain kind of a community? Imagine always being closely surrounded by thousands of colleagues sharing and brainstorming (24x7). So, when you want some inspiration you simply dip your toe into Twitter for a couple of hours, then step back (feeling overwhelmed), then reflect and then ... the LIGHTBULB MOMENTS!!!
Off-course, Twitter is many other things as well.
Your thoughts?
Saturday, September 26, 2009
SAEON?
I recently read an article in our local weekend news paper (Weekend Argus, 26/09/09, p13) on the South African Environmental Observation Network or SAEON. Two BIG takeaways:1. SAEON recently established a citzen science initiative where the layman will have an opportunity to report on anectdotal evidence of climate change. No details were given on how this intitiave would be co-ordinated. Also no mention was made of whether the Internet would be used. I think there's a great opportunity to use existing social media platforms such as Twitter and Flickr to record the obversations. Twitter has a publically available web API through which climate change twitter updates can be extracted for further analysis.
2. SAEON previously launched their "Birds Eye View" initiative through which the laymen can provide updates on bird sightings, e.g. looking out for the first arrivals of easily identified migratory birds species in our geographuical areas. The following is an extract from the newspaper article as mentioned above:
"Once we've pooled all this information from all over the country into a database, it will be really valuable. We can start building a puzzle of how plants and animals are responding in different areas over time to climate change. Already, across the northern hemisphere, deciduous trees are getting leaves, flowers are blooming and migratory birds are arriving anywhere from one to two weeks earlier than they did 30 years ago. In essence, spring has sprung - but it's all happening too soon ... As the timing of important events shift, we anticipate problems for the completion of life cycles in certain organisms."
Not sure about you but this sounds like the kind of thing that Twitter was born to do. I will keep you posted.
UP 3D
Our eldest son and I went to the cinema today to watch the movie UP in 3D. I must say, 3D technology has come a long way, gone are the days of the white plastic glasses with the red and blue lenses. The cinema we attended used REALD 3D technology (printed on the side of the black-framed glasses with grey lenses). If my previous "white plastic" 3D experience was rated a 3/10 then this was more like a 7/10, great but with room for more improvement.To me, the movie had a sad undertone to it for most of the way. It was also very inspiring and funny and made me reflect on the nature of my relationship with my wife and two boys. It's REALLY made me APPRECIATE them so much MORE. I truly am blessed. UP is great for the young and old. It comes highly recommended, an 8/10.
Check out the UP movie trailer on You Tube.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Fairwell at News Cafe in Blouberg
A friend of ours had her fairwell at the News Cafe (#NewsCafe) in #Blouberg earlier this evening. There was about 14 of us sitting upstairs alongside a window overlooking the bay, a truly amazing view. The service was good. The food was good (tapas-style). Our waiter, Lemmy, was at our beck and call. He even ventured off into the evening to buy a friend (one of the 14) a pack of cigarettes from the store down the road. The evening was less about the food and drinks and more about the conversation. Nevertheless, the drinks flowed and the food came in waves.The News Cafe uses wireless ATM / Credit Card machines, a very important security consideration, i.e. as a client I would prefer that my card is swiped in plain view by my waiter using a wireless machine at my table. Why? because this way I reduce the likelihood of fraud or some other form of identity theft.
Roots of Integrity, keeping my promises
Earlier this evening we informed our 4 year-old son that we were about to visit a friend for her fairwell, she will be relocating to #Johannesburg next Wed. My wife and I were planning to take our son to the cinema tomorrow for a movie, popcorn and a soda.We wanted to keep it a secret and thus surprise him tomorrow by fetching him early from school. He threw a tantrum when we informed him that we were about to go out for the evening and that his nanny would be taking care of him for the evening. In response to his tantrum my wife told him about our plans for tomorrow. I know my son, he'll keep us to it and will be SUPA grumpy until we deliver on our promise to him. If I was anything like him at his age then I understand my dad's actions as described in the next paragraph. I don't agree with it but I can certainly understand it.The "I promise to make this right by doing something else in return" experience with our son reminded me of an experience that remains etched in my memory to this day. I can't recall how old I was but I do remember being old enough to open a car door on my own. I remember my dad saying to me that he was going to buy us a TV and that we were going to purchase the TV the next day. The next day arrived and I must've nagged so much that he eventually said to me to wait in the car because we were going as promised. I remember running to the car, getting in and waiting. He didn't come to the car that day. Eventually my mom fetched me. It's amazing how this single experience made integrity so important to me today. Tomorrow's my turn with my son, deja vu :-)
Remember that children learn through our example (as adults and care givers). They learn very quickly. Each time I break a promise I teach my son that it's okay to break promises, to not keep your word, to lie.
Today at the Spa
My wifey and I spent the day at the Sanctuary Spa at the Twelve Apostles hotel in Cape Town (the pic insert to your left). I've had my fair share of spas in the past, some great and others not so good. Today was one of my best experiences. They're not the cheapest but our money was well spent. Our package included a Swedish massage, lunch, a pedi and an hour long facial. We also had access to (and thoroughly exploited) the spa's facilities which included a sauna, hot and cold pools, floatation tank, chill room and fruit buffet. It was a treat. Also, it was clean. A sign of a good experience is that it feels like it happened too quickly, this was how it felt with each of the treatments. No, I'm not getting paid to write this. I do, however, feel that credit should be given where it's due. Good customer service is rare.My masseuse asked me what the occassion was, why we decided to spoil ourselves? I explained that today was an opportunity for my wife and I to reconnect. We live very busy lives and spend most of our awake time working, whether to see to our kids or whether at work. The morale of the story? Make time to reconnect with your spouse. Remember, if you "lucky", the kids will move out after 20 years or so leaving you with your spouse in possibly a large empty house. Imagine how strained your relationship could be after 20 years of "no speaking or listening to each other". This is the reality of many today. Make every moment count!
Monday, September 21, 2009
Joy is...
watching my boys play nicely with each other and with their cousins. Amazing to witness the familial bonds spark and grow, enlightening. My lesson: their is value in maintaining the connection with my family, I may not always understand the dynamics though, who does anyway? Someone once told me that the only normal people are usually the people you don't know ;-) So there you have it and there it is.
Weekend Roadtrip
Returned earlier this afternoon from a weekend roadtrip along the southcoast of South Africa from Cape Town to Port Elizabeth and back. The countryside was nothing less than breathtaking, mostly a lush green with many hues of green and brown in between. Lots of roadworks, no doubt in preparation for the coming 2010 Football worldcup. We had a big family reunion, one evening of reconnecting with cousins, siblings, uncles, aunts, mom, dad, and friends of old. The experience, inspirational and rejuvinating. It was a great weekend and it's fantastic to be home again, my sanctuary.We stopped about 3 times in each direction, each time giving the kids an opportunity to "stretch" their legs (and exhaust themselves). My brother and his family accompanied us on our way back. It was lovely having them along while driving in our two-car convoy. Sometimes he kept the pace and sometimes I did. This helped with staying awake for the roughly 8 hour trip (each direction).
It was amazing to see our children playing with their cousings, wanting to be with their cousins 24x7. I remember having tons of fun with my cousins while growing up. We got up to mischief, as most kids would to. Today I have two sons and I can only imagine what they are getting up to that I'll never know about. Karma is a beach :-)
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Keeping breakfast interesting...
5 things that's worked and continue to work with our two boys (2 yrs and 4 yrs old):
- Introduce breakfast cereal bars (change brands/flavours often because it gets boring very quickly). Alternate with your usual cereal varieties, make it a treat.
- Blend up a milkshake out of the cereal (if possible) and use big straws to make it even more interesting.
- Make fun shapes whenever possible, especially when there's toast, egg or whatever, e.g. you could make a smiley face. Thats right, play a bit with your food :-). Our eldest enjoys this the most given his gravitation to fantasy play.
- Serve cereal without milk some days, makes for a crunchy breakfast.
- Experiment. Surf the web for other great ideas, there's millions of them going around.
Monday, September 14, 2009
Joy is...
understands what I'm asking of him,
e.g. please throw it in the bin?
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Keeping an Eye on My Patch of Earth
I live with my family on the edge of Rietvlei, a wetlands area in Cape Town, South Africa. Rietvlei is also a bird sanctuary and is home to an amazing variety of birds, some (flamingos) who visit for a few months at a time during their breeding season. I've lived on Rietvlei for eight years now. In a way, I'm it's part-time custodian, like every other land owner along Rietvlei. The same applies to your part of the world. This is our legacy.
My plan with this section of the blog is to keep a layman's account of the impact of global warming on Rietvlei and it's surrounds. In the last 5 years there's been noticable changes in our area in terms of climate and bird-life. If you have a blog that keeps track of climate change on your patch of earth then please share your website/blog details with me.
On a more brighter side, my wife took the above picture earlier today. It shows an orange bishop (bottom) and what looks like a yellowish-green weaver on our birdfeeder in the yard?
Saturday, September 5, 2009
The Future is Here, Great Intro to SocialMedia Trends and Tips
Men buy & Women Shop
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
The Slips in My Pockets
During the course of my work day I may or may not pay for parking as part of a client visit. I may or may not have a breakfast, lunch or dinner meeting with a client or I mighht meet a colleague for a meeting while out of the office, i.e. I collect slips/receipts during the day.
I used to loose my receipts. I did not have a consistent storage place for them, i.e. some of it was in various places in my car, some in my laptop bag, some in a jacket pocket, others on my desk, in the drawer, on a shelf in my bedroom, in my wallet and so on and son. At some point I stopped using my wallet because storing slips in my wallet lead to a swollen, uncomfortable and eventually deformed wallet that was in desperate need of replacement. So, I started keeping my slips in my work pants pockets. Each morning I transfer the slips from my previous day's pants to today's pants. I only keep slips that I use as part of my monthly work expense claim. The rest I throw awat. I also keep a monthly expense-claim envelope in the top draw of my cradenza. The idea is that I transfer my "pocket" slips to the envelope whenever I remember to do so (when I can no longer easlily find things in my pockets!). Then empty the envelope once per month as part of my monthly expense claim process. The system is not full-proof but it works (mostly)!
What does your pockets look like? Have you found a fullproof system that works for you? If so, then please share your wisdom with me?
PS: I now own a slim wallet that only takes plastic. Where did I leave my small change again??
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
A child's trust
From the day your child is born you, as the parent, very quickly become a beacon of safety to him. He trusts you completely. You are the centre of the universe to him or, in my case, my wife is nr 1 and I'm nr 4 in the "pecking" order. So, not dead-centre, but close enough. He depends on you. It is this trust that we (as parents) either strengthen or weaken over time, depending on the degree to which we invest in them. By investing in them I mean spending quality time with them, "being present" time.
The last thing my son did tonight before drifting off to sleep was slip his two Bakugan Battle Brawlers into my right-hand. That was him trusting me. He trusted me to put his brawlers up high where his younger brother could not get hold of it and then destroy it, these were and still are (at the time of writing) his most prized possessions. I hope we'll still share such a relationship of trust when he is my age one day.
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Sticker Backfire
The conversation then evolved to me having to categorise his "helper" work so that he clearly understood what it takes to earn a new sticker. Earlier he also said to me that he knew where the stickers are kept, implying that getting a sticker was a simple as fetching it in the draw under the microwave, perfectly logical.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
The Guilt
Immediately I felt guilty. We made up and he later went to bed with a smile on his face. However, the guilt lingered for a little while longer.
When he threw the sand in my face he was laughing. This was fun to him. I later had a much lighter conversation with him about his bad behaviour. He now (mostly) understands that this kind of behaviour is associated with being rude.
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Brown sugar vs. white sugar
What's better? what's more nutritional? brown or white sugar? Actually, neither is. Brown is fractionally better than white. Brown sugar is often referred to as "natural" or "raw" sugar giving most people I know the impression that using brown sugar makes consuming sugar OK. This is mostly incorrect. The major difference between white and brown is that brown sugar contains molasses. To be frank, a child does not care whether sugar is brown or white, as long as its sugar. The younger they are the more susceptible they are to bouncing off the walls when they're high on sugar. It's up to us as parents to ensure that we give our children a good start to life but teaching them healthy fundamentals in terms of schooling, nutrition, etiquette, manners, moralilty, dress-code and all other habits. Nutrition, like taking a morning shower, is a habit, good or bad. Research the alternatives.
BTW: The same principle described above applies to low fat milk vs. full cream milk, i.e. the difference is insignificant. Check the carton labels to compare the fat contents of the two options the next time you visit the supermarket.
Saturday, August 22, 2009
Before our children
At dinner parties we used to share stories of our cats with our friends. Now we share stories about our kids. I remember being quite annoyed with my friends who had kids (before we had our own). We could never have a decent conversation without at least one of the two parents running after a child that's either crying or up to mischief or both. This is my reality today, i.e. I'm one of those parents who keeps a watchful eye over his pride. Ask any parent what it's like to lose sight of their child for just 20 seconds in a crowded shopping centre. It's hell.
Joy is...
having fun together
(as well as alone) in
the garden with
my wifey and boys.
Joy is...
a winter's Saturday morning when
there's no rush for work or
school.
Friday, August 21, 2009
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Making time to build friendship(s)
Not sure about you, but my life is quite busy. There's work time, family time, father-son time x 2, husband-wife time, me time, social time and more. I'ts challenging to maintain solid friendships amidst all the happenings. A friend of mine recently said that it's been his experience that his colleagues and clients tend to become his friends. The same's happened to me. It's almost like twitter, but on a smaller scale ito connections and on a larger scale in terms of relationship depth.
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Fast & Furious
We rented the latest Fast & Furious from the neighbourhood video store the past weekend. The movie was super entertaining (if you like fast cars and retro car design). For me, it was less about the movie and more about me enjoining the experience with my eldest son, sitting at the edge of his seat.
Sunday, August 16, 2009
17 Again...
This movie has Zack Efron and Matthew Perry as co-stars. It's about a guy whose life choices leads him to an unhappy place involving a divorce, getting fired and having two teenagers that wanted nothing to do with him. So his "spirit guide" magically makes him 17 again, but 17 today, not 17 back in time, lovely twist. This article is less of a traditional movie review. This is about what I took away from watching it. It was about appreciation and connection. It was about making an effort and not blaming others for your choices. It was about acceptance and about doing what it takes as a dad to help your family harness their potential.
Why build a neighbourhood?
I live in a cul de sac in Cape Town. Today, I met one of my neighbours for the first time. He's been living in our street for the past 2.5 years. I've been living here for eight years now. So let me bring your attention to the present moment. Our world is in crisis, economic crisis, climatic crisis, disease, poverty, war, etc. Whats gone wrong? How did we get here? How did we get so far off course as a collective?
Global harmony starts with harmony at home. The foundation of the community is built at home. Yes, I'm aware that the Internet is vast and that much has been written on this subject. The views expressed on my blog are my views as a result of my direct experience with the subject. Consider my input as one of many millions of opnions on the subject matter. I'd be curious to hear whether or not your experience in any way parallel's mine.
I grew up in a community where the kids played outside until late at night, unharmed. We roamed free. We felt safe. A community in which my kid was protected by the rest of the community, where my kid was your kid. It seems those days have passed. Children don't play on their own in the streets anymore, not for long periods. I now live in a world where people mostly do not know their neighbours, often never having met them before. Surely there's something odd about this picture?
Action for today: I choose to take back my neighbourhood, one neighbour at a time.
Saturday, August 15, 2009
Friday, August 14, 2009
Joy is...
my eldest son (3.5 years old) asking me to
snuggle with him when
he's tired and
ready for bed.
The effect of Comprise
The Oxford dictionary defines compromise as "an agreement reached by each side making concessions". Compromising by giving up some of my social and/or work activities so that my partner can attend to something that she regards as being more of a priority is not easy. It may (has in the past) induce resentment within me, with resentment being equated to the process of drinking poison hoping the other will die. It did, however, make it easier to accept the situation when I came to realise that, in the grander scheme of things, the end result was worth it. In the end we choose whether or not we would like to work together to build a great future for ourselves and our children. This is done through our actions, through my actions.
The effect of Comprising for the sake of the other may (has in my case) facilitate a healthier relationship. Also think about this ito being a living example to (y)our children by demonstrating a healthy behavioural pattern.
I'm in no way suggesting that one should live for the other. Instead, I'm suggesting that it's healthy to invest some effort in attaining a balance between all that is me and all that is us.
Thursday, August 13, 2009
Making "me time"
As a young dad I cannot stress how challenging yet vitally important it is to build in some "me time" into your life. I know that it's difficult to achieve and then maintain a healthy balance. More of one thing means less of another. However, don't let me stop you! "Me time" to me is about rejuvenation. It's about doing whatever I choose to do. It's not about impressing another. It's about enjoyment. It's about absorption."Me time" for me is updating my blog, playing my PS3 after everyone's gone to bed, having a long hot shower, driving my car with no passengers while listening to whatever music suits my mood at that moment and it's also watching a good sci-fi movie. I'd also like to squeeze in a regular cardio-vascular exercise program but can't seem to find the time between my work, social and family commitments. More experienced parents have told me not to stress about it since it gets easier as your children get older. I'll keep you posted on whether this holds true for my situation.
They all say the same thing, i.e. enjoy the time with your children when they still want to be in your company all the time, when you are the centre of the universe to them. Make the most of the time together because, before you know it, it's come and gone.
Check-list for dressing your toddler
These are the basics I do with my boy while getting him ready for pre-school in the morning:1. Give him cereal before dressing him since there is a high probability that he will mess while eating his cereal (3.5 years old)
2. Wash his face
3. Brush his teeth
4. Brush his hair
5. Help him take off his pyjamas
6. Dress him (undies, socks, pants/shorts, shirt and jersey if cold outside)
7. Put on his shoes
8. Pack him a lunch (if there's time)
9. Give him a Gumi-Vite (a multi-vitamin for young children)
Obviously, if there's time, I allow him to explore doing the tasks above on his own. In fact, he usually insists on doing it himself. Usually, he likes to squeeze in a game or two, like running off with his socks and expecting me to chase him or jumping on the bed and asking me to join in. We also use a sticker system where he gets a sticker if he co-operates in the morning. When the sticker-count gets to 10 then there's a reward in it for him.
If you like me and your time in the morning is SUPA limited then it helps to take out his clothing the evening before.
PS: The sticker-system works equally well with helping him keep his room tidy and encouraging him to sleep in his own bed.
Joy is...
arriving at my boy's school to fetch him, then scanning the playground for him, then our eyes meeting, then him realizing that he's daddy's arrived to take him home, then his smile :-))
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Teaching children by our example
Each day, whether we are aware of it or not, we teach our children through our actions/interactions. We teach through modelling our behaviour to them that they then copy. Monkey see monkey do. This behaviour is both the desirable and the not so desirable, the good and the ugly. From nose-picking, to the use of slang, swear-words, to addictions, to our use of syntax, eating habits, love of certain TV and music genres, interpersonal skills (or not), sleeping habits, general mood, emotional maturity, and so on and so on. The list is endless. We are presented with a near-blank slate and give it our best, our worst and our "in between". Question to the parents is, what is it that we are teaching our children? What are we perpetuating? Is it healthy for our children? What kind of a future are we co-creating today for the coming generations? Does all of this matter? What kind of a future would we like to co-create? Is it worth getting more actively involved? I don't know, you tell me.
Sunday, August 9, 2009
A glimpse into our children's education future
Lyrics to Baz Luhrmann's "Sunscreen" song
Video time: 5 minutes
Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of ’99 If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience…I will dispense this advice now.
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh nevermind; you will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded. But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked….You’re not as fat as you imagine.
Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm on some idle Tuesday.
Do one thing everyday that scares you
Sing
Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with people who are reckless with yours.
Floss
Don’t waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes you’re behind…the race is long, and in the end, it’s only with yourself.
Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you succeed in doing this, tell me how.
Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements.
Stretch
Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your life…the most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year olds I know still don’t.
Get plenty of calcium.
Be kind to your knees, you’ll miss them when they’re gone.
Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll have children,maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary…what ever you do, don’t congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either – your choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s. Enjoy your body, use it every way you can…don’t be afraid of it, or what other people think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever own..
Dance…even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.
Read the directions, even if you don’t follow them.
Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.
Get to know your parents, you never know when they’ll be gone for good.
Be nice to your siblings; they are the best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and go,but for the precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.
Travel.
Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old, and when you do you’ll fantasize that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.
Respect your elders.
Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one might run out.
Don’t mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will look 85.
Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it’s worth.
But trust me on the sunscreen…
Joy is...
discussing interesting things about strange-looking fish with my 3.5 year old boy while visiting the oceanarium together.
Interview with a 19yr old thumb-typing expert
Would you say its fair to refer to you as knowing what you want from life? "No. You also can't tell me what I want because I don't even know." But with every topic you have a clear answer. "I might have a straight answer but tomorrow my mood could change and my answer could change. Therefore, I am my worst enemy, lol." She confessed to having a short attention span and being good at multi-tasking. She prefers reading short bursts of information such as the short status lines in Facebook and abbreviated mobile text messages. However, she responded by saying that "I have very bad memory skills. I'm always so busy doing something (like having a verbal as well as mobile-based text conversation at the same time), it's almost like its a blur". She also mentioned that sometimes she forgets who said what.
This, ladies and gentlemen, is our next generation, the next link to eternity.
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